Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Validation

I was all of 22 when I realized the power of validation

Bruised

Battered

And weary

I desperately needed



Someone to tell me it was not my fault

That ‘bad’ things do in fact happen to ‘good’ people

That I was beautiful just the way I was

Maybe even ‘too good’ for him?

But most importantly

That he had hurt me the way I said he had



And that’s the essence of validation

To a young woman, abused child or broken adult

Just to know that you are being heard, understood, and believed

To know that there is someone who says I empathize with you

It must have been tough

You have been strong

I am proud of you


To have someone say Go on I’m listening

I will not judge you

Hurt you

Or laugh


I will not minimize your pain

Tell it to go away, disappear

In stead

I will live it through with you

Each moment

Till we both heal


I will not tell you that there are bigger things in life to cry over

I will in fact tell you that your pain will help you grow

I will not tell you to let the past be..forget it..move on

I will in fact remind you of the goodness of your heart, joy in your

soul, and the deep love you have within.


Too often in life we are very quick to judge

Rarely are we quick enough to reach out

To empathize

Hold a hand

Give a hug

Share a smile

It is only when we believe in the power of validation

That we can transform lives

And it is then that I believe

that

Miracles do happen